For murray

Putting all talk
of destinations aside;
having no map
does not mean you are lost...

Just because it feels darker
than we remember in bible stories
does not mean
you are blind.

questions may seem closer
than the familiar voices of God.
each one another hash mark
on an empty chalk board
as stars on a horizon

do not let the horizon
distract from one foot
in front of the other

you will write and find no words
as if praying to only paper
mere whispers of fire fly wings

prayers at times more like
suicide notes
love at times more like
dry heaving on truth you wish
you could swallow

I promise God is still there
hiding in the atoms
between breathing in and breathing out

Your heart will keep beating
perpetual
like the sound of stilettos
in an empty hall

I promise you are not alone
between wanting to live and wanting to die

Saying your human
may seem more like making
excuses for fuck ups

I promise that life still holds forgiveness
between mistakes and mistakes

What is empty and silent like
lost echoes in your rib cage
could disguise itself as an ending
but it is only space for a new beginning.